Create 1x100

"A small act is worth a million thoughts."
-Ai Wei Wei

In the spirit of this wisdom, I'm going to do one small act of creativity a day, for one hundred days, and then share it.  I most likely won't blog everyday (hahaha, who am I kidding?!  I KNOW I won't blog everyday!), but I will post to Instagram (and maybe FB and Twitter, too) using the hashtag #create1x100.  If you'd like to get your creative juices flowing, I'd love to have you join me!  I am feeling the need to create some new patterns in my life and break up some old - so the small act of posting this and beginning this one hundred day journey is one way I'm going about that.

My small act today is the first draft of this poem that was inspired by our family's first visit to the ocean while here in Portugal.  I've been to the ocean many times before and have long known that I'd like to live near a big body of water, but there was something about this particular visit that was more profound.  Here is my first stab at place-marking and trying to figure out what this experience was about:

The Ocean

I know now that this

this water
this depth
this color
this expanse
this room for sky
this sun glittering on the surface
this unknown power that drops so deep
this home to life
this mystery

this

is what I have been missing

***

And just like that...I'm sharing something.  Something that feels incomplete, something that my ego wants to rear up and say "Oh my GOD!  STOP!!! Do not share - it is not good enough yet!"

But I'm so tired of that song and dance - it's always the same- me and my stuff?  We aren't ever good enough. 

Okay, so fine.  I'm going to proceed anyway.  That voice has been saying the same thing since I was 11, and no matter what I've done, it's never enough for that voice. 

I've tried arguing with the voice, I've tried proving it wrong.  I've tried coaching, therapy, hypnosis, overachieving, law school, marathons, triathlons, degrees, programs, classes, certificates, you name it.  None of it has ever been good enough. 

So, whatever "good enough" is, I've decided I don't need it and I don't need to be it.

I do know I need creativity, I know I need to create.  If you need this as well (and I believe we all do), again, I'd love to have you join me.  Just hashtag #create1x100 and share to IG. 

You don't need to be good enough, you just need to get moving and make something.  One small act. 

Love,
Leah
 

For Giving

Continuing along the theme of how I'm way tired of how I guard/hoard most of what I write and think-

here is the first draft of a poem I wrote today...

For Giving

That dark weight I felt in my chest
I looked to see
a black rock, like coal-
but more dense, like obsidian-
Made of all the roses
I hadn't given away

I kept them, not for myself
Not for you.
I kept them because
they weren't good enough.
I didn't know if you'd want them anyway-

So I held them in,
My heart wrapped tightly around them,
Closed in on its self,
unforgiving.

That hand that should've been giving
instead was clenching,
holding on for dear life,
but crushing any chance of it.

But I breathed the other day,
like I haven't breathed in so long-
Maybe decades.

And felt
an unfurling

This time I'm giving it all away.


****
Thank you for being out there.

Love,
Leah

 

STAINED GLASS MAGNOLIAS

STAINED GLASS MAGNOLIAS
Leah Campbell Badertscher, All Rights Reserved

"God cannot do for us what we do not allow Him to do through us." 
-Marianne Williamson, from a live event she did in London, Spring 2016

I have been thinking about this ever since attending a talk  Marianne Williamson gave in London a couple weeks ago.  These words (and other wisdom she shared) gave me a lot to think about.  It also reminded me of this painting, which was the first I did (has it been 4-5 years ago already?!) where I felt like I really began to allow to let flow something I'd been longing for, and sensing within myself, for so, so long.  

You'll see words in it like "unfold," "attend," "flow," "trust," "your voice matters," "your story matters,"  and "Believe."  All words that I needed to heal and free myself and all representing the very real healing, liberating, creative, loving energies that I experienced when creating this painting and that I know flowed into it.  

I'm at a stage where I'm asking and feeling for what's next for my art - and the world- so it was a perfect time to hear these words and consider what I need to open up and allow to be done through me.

I wanted to share in case they are the words you've been needing to hear as well.  

Love, 

Leah

P.S. THANK YOU and BIG HUGS to those of you who have purchased reproductions of STAINED GLASS MAGNOLIAS and my other paintings through my Society6 shop and then sent pictures or tagged me in photos of where my artwork - now YOUR artwork- lives in your home, your office, your life!  I so LOVE that!  And for those of you who feel called by this piece or touched by another, I do currently offer high-quality reproductions through this site: https://society6.com/leahcb
XOXO

THE LOTUS

THE LOTUS

2015, Leah Campbell Badertscher

For private collection, Toronto, Canada

 

I'm grateful to have so much demand for commissions that I currently am unable to begin new commissions until October 1.  At that time, the fee for commissioned work will be $3.00/square inch plus S&H (for those of you who were looking into commissions before, please note that this is an increase, although if you have already spoken to me about commissioning a piece before October, it will be at that former price).  50% of the entire amount is required as a deposit in order to begin the piece and the balance is due before delivery. 

Also, the brief down low on how I do commissions is this: it's very intuitive.  I would love for you to know the size and please let me know if you have colors you love and if you know where you think the piece might go (though these latter two are not necessary), and from there I "interview" you to create an absolutely stunning, one-of-a-kind piece that is something that you will love and cherish!  I may also ask you for photographs, favorite songs, poems, places to travel, etc. - if that's what seems appropriate.  It's a different way of working, I know - but it works, like magic, and it is A LOT of fun!  I guarantee that the entire experience, from interview to updates to the final product, will be a beautiful, life-enhancing one.

If you'd like to get your name on the waitlist for October (in time for Christmas gifts!) , please email me at leahbadertscher[at]gmail[dot]com.  You can also sign up for my newsletter at www.leahcb.com to receive an occasional notice about new works and special offers. 

Thank you!

Love,

Leah